A Letter From The President

 Bob Dorr, PFLAG Omaha

 Posted on April 21, 2004

At each monthly PFLAG meeting, we sit in a circle around tables. Each person tells a little bit or his or her own story. There is no pressure to talk.
It is OK to pass.

This is our support time.

People come who are hurting. A marriage has broken up--one partner is straight, the other gay. Parents struggle to understand why their son is gay, or their daughter is lesbian.

We are not professional counselors. All we have to offer is our own understandings based on our experience and our study. We listen. We are not judgmental. We want to help people.

The PFLAG members I admire a lot are the ones who got over their own hurting a long ago and keep coming back month after month, telling a piece of their own story for the tenth time, or the hundredth time.

Every so often, someone will tell us that, for them, PFLAG made all the difference. They had a safe place to come and to talk and to be with people who understand.

Support time is open to all. Our only requirement is confidentiality. Not everything that happens during support time is serious. We laugh more than we cry. A few times recently, we’ve gotten a little too rowdy. That results in side conversations and a buzz that is distracting.

We are a secular group, not a religious group, but our support time is sacred—and during this sacred time, we should give full attention and proper respect to every person.

Moving on . . .

It is sad that the Omaha police union’s leadership backed away from the provision in its proposed labor contract with the City of Omaha that would have given two very limited benefits to police officers with same-sex partners.

The proposed contract had provided that officers could use their sick leave to care for their same-sex partners or their relatives. Also, officers could have used paid leave to attend funerals of partners and their relatives.

The proposed contract needed City Council approval. We owe thanks to Councilmen Marc Kraft and Franklin Thompson, who supported the benefits. Councilmen Chuck Sigerson and Dan Welch opposed the benefits. The other three councilmen were undecided or declined comment.

In one form or another, this issue will return many times in the coming months and years in Omaha and elsewhere. And it should return. It’s a simple matter of fairness and equality.

Bob Dorr, president